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Peter Nguyens Terribly Awesome Essays On Friendship

Oscar Wilde – (1854-1900)

Oscar Wilde was a brilliant Irish novelist (The Portrait of Dorian Gray), poet (Ballad of Reading Gaol) and playwright (The Importance of Being Earnest). His writings show his innate predisposition towards humanity’s foibles and as such he was a keen observer of people. This was a critical element of his success.

He was married and had two children before acknowledging his homosexuality, and as a result, he was a uniquely qualified observer of women in particular, and their predilections.

Mr. Wilde’s many quotes about women, and their relationships with the men in their lives, are at times, profound. Most of his observations still apply to the women of today, but only if the shroud of feminist orthodoxy is first removed.

It is very unfortunate that much of the truth about the natural interconnection between men and women is now clouded by radical, second-wave feminism’s bizarre assertions that these relationships are somehow flawed, unnatural, dangerous, don’t exist or are unnecessary.

At the very least, these claims are preposterous and ridiculous and yet, most of today’s college educated women believe some, or all, of these misguided pronouncements. At the very worst, they are outright lies which seek to inflame unnecessary turmoil between the sexes and thereby deny each, the happiness to which they are naturally entitled – happiness unencumbered by the psychotic and erroneous views of radical, second-wave feminists about Christian men, their interests, their priorities and their motivations.

The following quote by Wilde clearly states the reason why so many of today’s men and women are on a constant collision course. It debunks one of radical feminism’s most pernicious lies – their claim that men and women can be “friends.”

Unobstructed by radical feminism, Oscar Wilde instead expresses the truth on this matter when he wrote, “Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love but no friendship.” His view, and that of hundreds of generations of men before him, is the polar opposite of the current view held by radical, second-wave feminism. Today, radical feminism purports that “friendship” is not only possible but preferable to marital love between the sexes. This whole premise is a baseless delusion, and the reason? Simply put, men don’t want to be “friends” with women! Period. But of course, we know what radical feminists think of men’s opinions. So, as a result, millions of naive, college-educated women believe these nutty women, rather than the men who love them. Brilliant.

To make matters worse, radical, career-oriented, feminism has thrown these very same women into the environs of what were traditionally all-male institutions, such as organized religion, the military, judiciary, government, politics, academia and business.

This shift is also based on the even more preposterous premise that men and women can be “friends” atwork.

Obviously, most of the radical leaders of feminism are lesbians and why young women would believe their assertions about men, rather than the men themselves, just shows how gullible young women truly are!

This entire farce has caused more problems than ever anticipated because the lesbian feminists refuse to acknowledge the strong chemistry, and love, which naturally develops between normal men and women.

Unrelated men and women, working together for most of their waking hours, provides more temptations than the limited interaction of the traditional courting parameters.

In many cases, “working together” finally trumps existing marriages, increasing the divorce rate dramatically.

Working together puts stress on established marriages because the physical attraction between the sexes is naturally agitated by close contact. And where is there closer contact outside the home, other than at work?

The chronic problems experienced by both sexes, while trying to be “friends” at work, only confirms the fallacy of the radical, feminist’s assertions. Friendship is not possible between men and women, mainly because being friends with a woman is impossible for a man.

Men, through no fault of their own, see that type of pursuit as pointless! If they wanted to hang out with a “friend”, they’d call one of their male buddies. They make much better “friends” because guys can compete with each other, on the same level playing field. They can hunt, build something, drink, play sports, drive fast, etc. without dumbing-down the challenges involved. They don’t have to worry about lowering the standards of the game, restricting their competitive edge, ignoring their need to win at all costs, holding back physically or changing the rules in order to accommodate a woman. They can just play, hard and fast!

When men want to pursue a woman, they pursue her for one reason, and it isn’t “friendship.” (And if the woman handles the situation like a lady, the results are beyond rewarding.)

The truth is that if a guy isn’t interested in a woman physically, he’s not interested in her at all, which is probably why radical feminists are always so bitchy.

“Friendship” is never a motivating factor for a guy in pursuit of a woman. That’s just the way nature works. And for good reason! Duh! Humanity would cease to exist if that physical attraction were not there.

Radical feminists deny this attraction, and the love that eventually cements the relationships between men and women, and between women and children, because it undermines everything radical feminism stands for. And, despite their rants to the contrary, they are THE most important reasons why men and women bind themselves together for life. It’s the love, stupid!

This thought traumatizes the dysfunctional, unloved, radical feminists because the unvarnished truth is that, unlike homosexual relationships, which dissolve 50% more often than heterosexual relationships, and lesbian relationships, which dissolve 167% more often than heterosexual relationships, traditional Christian monogamy works, and it makes for happy couples and happy children!

These wacky radical females deliberately choose to ignore these facts because it proves that they, and their very lives, are frauds, based on false premises and down right lies.

Men and women were designed by God to marry and love and care for each other and have children. The proof? God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. Nor did He create Eve and Genevieve. And only a nut could believe otherwise.

These non-Christian, anti-Christian, radical feminists want the dishonest concept of “friendship” to screw-up normal people’s lives, knowing that it is an impossible scenario to subject men and women to, for longer than a short period of time.

These difficult women want normal people to be tempted in ways that, thanks to Christian civilization, were declared null and void just 50 years ago. The turmoil makes them happy. They enjoy watching people become as miserable as they are themselves, within their bizarre relationships.

The truth is that the natural development of respect, love, marriage and a lifetime of committment are first predicated on the physical attraction of a man for a particular woman and secondly, on that woman’s acceptance of his attention. There is nothing complicated about this arrangement  

When this type of, male/female, interaction is released from the traditional bonds of Christian courtship rituals, and unleashed in the workplace, the results are less than commendable.

Not only does the interjection of young, college educated, women into workplaces that were originally designed for men-only, make it nearly impossible for men to perform their jobs at the demanding levels they would normally expect from one another, but the adoption of the ideology of radical feminism within the workplace has given license to these intrusive females to criticize the historically successful managerial skills of men.

The rules of conflict for men CANNOT be applied to women because, unlike men, women just don’t care that much about the outcome. They just want the changes to accommodate them. “Can’t we just all get along?” NO. So what’s left? Let’s all be friends? NO!

Despite what the women believe, in the global worlds of business, government, politics, judiciary, healthcare, military, organized religion and academia, there’s more at stake than “friendship.”

Under these crazy circumstances, the tight-knit work environment will always be fraught with male/female tension, while “liberated” females pretend “friendship” is possible, and the men know it is not! While goal-oriented men want results, and sensitive women want more “friends.”

Women are just too distracting for men to be able to work at their peak performance levels. And, the radical feminists love to watch them struggle to find a balance because a “balance” is nearly impossible to find since men cannot, by nature, ignore a woman’s suggestion or demand, leading to interminable “wild goose chases!” 

Men’s desire to see women happy, worked wonderfully when it was confined to the home. But in the workplace, women’s unreasonable, or irrational, requests, and their added accusations that the workplace is “sexist” and must be changed to accommodate their female “needs”, is such an alien concept in the male world of work that it wreaks havoc with them, and the systems they created. AND, it costs a fortune to try to accomplish, with results that are abysmal.

Whether or not women want to admit it, they are a serious, and constant, distraction for men. That’s a good thing when applied under the right set of circumstances. It’s the way God designed men and women to interact physically and, it is as it should be! It was a happy path that led to love, marriage and children.

But today, in this post-radical, second-wave feminist “sexual revolution” era, the safety nets of traditional Christian courtship are all but gone, causing the workplace conflicts to generate societal, as well as personal, disasters over and over and over again. Affairs and liaisons undertaken, lies promulgated, marriages destroyed, unwanted pregnancies aborted, divorces acquired and families scattered, as children weep.

Men cannot, nor should they be expected to, ignore the very essence of their nature, in order to pretend, for appearances sake, or worse, political correctness, that women are “friends” and no different from men.

This is an asinine premise, fraught with conflict and doomed to failure. This is why men’s working  environments were devoid of women throughout most of history.

Not only is the male/female platonic “friendship” concept a preposterous notion espoused by feminism, but it is a disruptive, frustrating, and an alarmingly stressful, experience for the men involved.

This arrangement deliberately sets the young men up for The Fall because it is unfair to expect men to behave as though women are just like them, when every fiber of their bodies screams otherwise.

And, unless you are an idiot, or a brainwashed feminist, everyone knows why! Without this powerful desire to find a mate, humanity would disappear.

And, of course, radical feminism has groups of crazy females whose lives are wrapped around that same irrational premise too. These freaks actually believe that humanity’s demise is the only way to SAVE the planet. Come on! Give me a break!! Fifty years ago, they would have been committed to the loony bin.

Radical, second-wave feminists hate men and they know that by pushing more and more young women into the workforce they are setting up conflicts and temptations for healthy males, which are nearly inescapable.

Like the biblical Adam, they know, that in our highly sexualized world, millions of young men will give into temptation, allowing the radical feminists to slam those same healthy guys into oblivion, as “male chauvinist, sexist, pigs”, once again.

These warped women have the system rigged in both directions, and until the men start to shut them down, nothing will ever change.

There are days when I fully understand these wacky feminist’s twisted declarations, especially when you considered the dysfunctional upbringings from which most evolved, but what I can’t understand is the implementation, and acceptance, of their loony assertions by the men in charge of our illustrious institutions!!

Do these guys hate men too? Or, are they such pathetic cowards, that they’ve  actually been intimidated into silence by these anti-Christian loud, pushy, difficult women, and their wacky theories? Have the older Christian men opted for silence rather than standing up to feminist tyranny, and, at the same time, supporting a truly male-oriented system that releases the innate productivity, and personal drive, of working young men who are just starting out?

Either way, they better get over it!!!

The radical feminists LOVE the controversy, the agony, the misery these situations generate for men. They love seeing them eat crow just because they are behaving according to their very nature.

These women gloat over the trouble they have caused Christian men. Nothing makes them happier than to see these normal men lose their ability to lead, as they politely interact with female co-workers on ships, in police cars, in college dorms, at fire houses, in rectories, in academia, in officer’s clubs, in boardrooms, on call, on watch, on duty, etc., etc., etc.

It’s time for the older guys to speak up in defense of the younger men who want to give-it-all to their jobs. Continuing to subject them to this type of female torture will ALWAYS end badly. They will continue to disappoint themselves, and others, because the urge to mate is SO overwhelming.

They cannot, nor should they be expected to, ignore the testosterone God has rightfully invested in them. It is there for a good reason and to ignore that basic need, will be at our own peril as a Christian civilization.

Lance Cpl. Sara Castromata. “Marine” at center of murder/suicide at Quantico.

It’s time to admit the truth.

This ridiculous feminist experiment of placing unrelated men and women in close quarters is not working. Cries of rape, the sting of illegitimacy, abortion, drug and alcohol abuse, the trauma of suicide and murder (including murder/suicide involving 1 female and 2 male Marines at Quantico Base in March) have all resulted from this pathetic feminist hoax. The truth is, there can be no friendship between men and women! Period. 

And so, it’s  time to remove the “friendly” temptresses, let the guys get back to work, and when their hard work is done, let them go faithfully home each night, to the wives and children they love.


It’s the Women, Not the Men!

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Back in 2007, I took a trip to Vietnam. Upon leaving, I swore I’d never go back. The only way I’ll give this place a second chance is if I meet a girl who really wants to go to Vietnam or if some business trip takes me there. Who knows what the future will hold, but for the time being, I never want to return. And the reason for that is one of my most-asked questions. People email me several times a week asking why, in this post about myself, I single Vietnam out as being my least favorite country. What could be so bad about it?

Well, I figured it was time to give an answer.

The simple answer is that no one ever wants to return to a place where they felt they were treated poorly. When I was in Vietnam, I was constantly hassled, overcharged, ripped off, and treated badly by the locals.

I constantly met street sellers who tried to openly overcharge me. There was the bread lady who refused to give me back the proper change, the food seller who charged me triple even though I saw how much the customer in front of me paid, or the cabbie who rigged his meter on the way to the bus station. While buying T-shirts in Hoi An, three women tried to keep me in their store until I bought something, even if that meant pulling on my shirt.

On a trip to Halong Bay, the tour operator didn’t have water on the boat and had overbooked the trip, so people who paid for single rooms suddenly found themselves with roommates…sometimes in the same bed!

One of the worst experiences came while in the Mekong Delta. I was catching a bus back to Ho Chi Minh City. I was thirsty, so I went to get a common drink in Vietnam — water, lemon, and some powdery, sugary substance in a plastic bag. The woman making this concoction looked at me, laughed at her friends, and then started laughing at me while clearly not putting in all the ingredients into this drink. I wasn’t born yesterday and knew I was being blatantly ripped off. She was cheating me right to my face.

“She’s telling her friends she’s going to overcharge and rip you off because you’re white,” said a Vietnamese-American who was also on my bus. “She doesn’t think you will notice.” “How much should this really cost?” I asked my new companion. I gave the vendor the correct change, told her she was a bad person, and walked away. It wasn’t the money I cared about — it was her utter disrespect.

I wondered if it was just me. Perhaps I simply had a bad experience and Vietnam was really amazing. Maybe I just had bad luck. Maybe I just caught people on an off day. But after talking to a number of other travelers, I realized that we all had the same stories. Hardly anyone had a good one, which might explain why 95% of tourists don’t return. They all had tales of being ripped off, cheated, or lied to. They never felt welcome in the country either.

I witnessed other people having problems in Vietnam. I saw friends getting ripped off. Once when my friend bought bananas, the seller walked away before giving the change back. At a supermarket, a friend was given chocolate instead of change. Two of my friends lived in Vietnam for six months, and even they said the Vietnamese were rude to them despite becoming “locals.” Their neighbors never warmed up to them. My friends were always outsiders — strangers even to those they saw every day. Wherever I went, it seemed my experience was the norm, not the exception.

I’ve encountered many travelers who thought the people in Vietnam were really nice and enjoyed their travels there. I’ve often wondered why there’s such a disparity in experiences. Well, there’s one common difference between the travelers who have liked it and those who have hated it. Most of the people who had a good experience traveled in luxury, while those who didn’t were backpackers and budget travelers. It’s a curious thing to think about and reinforces a story I once heard.

While in Nha Trang, I met an English teacher who had been in Vietnam for many years. He said that the Vietnamese are taught that all their problems are caused by the West, especially France and the United States, and that Westerners “owe” the Vietnamese. They expect Westerners to spend money in Vietnam, so when they see travelers trying to penny-pinch, they get upset and thus look down on backpackers and treat them poorly. Those who are spending money, however, seem to be treated quite well. I don’t know if this is true or not, but given what I saw, it makes some sense.

I’m not here to make judgments about Vietnam or the Vietnamese. I don’t believe everyone in the country is bad or rude. I only have my travel experience to reflect upon. You should go and make up your own mind. After three weeks in Vietnam, I couldn’t get out fast enough. Why would I want to stay in a country that treated me like that? Why would I ever want to go back?

I don’t care that they tried to overcharge me. It’s not about the money. I’m happy to pay more — a dollar goes a lot further for them than it does for me. But just because I’m a backpacker doesn’t mean I deserve any less respect than anyone else.

I wasn’t looking for the royal treatment, just basic respect. And I never felt respected in Vietnam. I felt like people there looked at me not as a human being but just as someone who could be ripped off. There are rude people everywhere, but it was so disproportionately bad that if I never went back to Vietnam, I wouldn’t feel too bad about it.

But just because I didn’t like Vietnam doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go. This is my experience, but you should always just take what someone says, file it away, and go yourself. And if you don’t go because of this article, I’ll find you and drag you there myself!

You can plan your trip using my Vietnam guide to find out what to see and do, save money, and avoid getting ripped off.

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